HOW to do SHADOW WORK & HEAL traumas

Everyone has a shadow side in him or her. I like to see the shadow side of us like a moon. One side of the MOON is always in the light, while the other side is in the dark. The SUN can only light up one side, this can stand for polarity, the yin and yang. 

From earth we can see all the light during a full moon, while the shadow can’t be seen. On the other hand, during a new moon, the shadow can be seen, but not the light. This phase can be a great metaphor for shadow work. Instead of only focussing on the light, you focus (also) on the shadow.

In the phases of the moon, every phase is important. Full moon and new moon are crucial in the rhythms of the moon. Like the moon goes through phases, we do too. Sometimes we focus a lot on our gifts and talents that we have already discovered. While during other phases in our life we do a lot of inner work and heal traumas. This phase can be called shadow work. 

You have to understand that those phases can differ and also intertwine. You can have a month of dedication to shadow work. However, it can also be just 15 minutes a day acknowledging your inner child. For everyone it will be different. Feel how you want to do your shadow work and don’t force it because *everyone else does it*. Only do it because it feels good for you. 

Another thing that you need to realize is that you don’t have to call this shadow work per se. For example, I have never really felt a strong phase in which I worked on traumas. I never sat down with the conscious intention of doing shadow work. To me it was more about realizing things along the road. I will talk more about my journey later on 🙂

Maybe you have done a lot of shadow work already, without realizing it! It’s totally possible, because it’s not about doing this and that. It’s about an inner journey of understanding and healing. 

WHAT IS SHADOW WORK

How someone practices shadow work can differ. However, it all comes down to the same thing. You look at the sides in you that are more hidden. Instead of looking at the scars, you look at where the scars came from. There is a chance that they also left mental and/or spiritual “scars”. For example I have some scars on my body that came from a traumatic experience. It sounds really silly but it gave me a fear of plasters. Yes, I had those physical scars, but I also got mental/spiritual scars from this experience. 

Most of the time, we try to ignore the scars or we hope that time will heal it. While this may be true in some cases, in other cases they need more work. When you don’t acknowledge your wounds they don’t get the care they need and won’t heal. That’s why people are doing shadow work. So that they can heal from the things hidden in them.

“I WAS NOT WEAK”

As I already said in the introduction, I didn’t set the intention to do shadow work. For me, it comes naturally on my path. For example, a few years ago certain information came in the news about gymnastics. It was about experiences I have also had. I have not had such intense experiences (sexual abuse), but during that period I was not very happy.

I always thought it was just me and that I was weak and too sensitive. Now I found out that there was a structural problem in gymnastics. This has helped me a lot to give these experiences a place. It’s also interesting because I thought for years that certain experiences were normal, but when I started to think back about the things I experienced I realized that 7 year old children shouldn’t have those experiences.

As a child you are very innocent and you don’t realize that certain things aren’t normal to experience. When you grow older, you try to push these experiences away, because in some way, they traumatize you. When you start to heal your traumas, you learn about the things that may have happened that weren’t okay. Realizing this can help you understand your boundaries and make sure they aren’t crossed. 

HOW TO DO SHADOW WORK

Since you are reading this article, you may be interested in some ways you can start your journey! Well, then here is a list of things you can do. Remember to let things flow and not to force anything. If you feel like living in the light for now, that’s okay. There will be a time in which you will want to do the inner work. Accept your unique journey and go with the flow!

(SHADOW) JOURNAL

Journaling about experiences you have had can be very therapeutic. Your journal can be like a friend. A friend that won’t talk behind your back or judge you. Know that your journal is a safe space to return to after a busy day. 

If you want to talk about your inner child, open your journal and start writing. If you don’t know where to start writing, just type in google “shadow work journal prompts” and you will find a list of questions to start with. This will help you get into the flow of writing. Most of the time, beginning to write is the hardest part of writing an article.

MEDITATE

Meditation calms the mind and helps you connect with your inner self. In this inner self can be a shadow side that we hide. By focusing on the shadow side, shine a light on her and this way she can feel loved. Moreover, you can heal certain things you’ve experienced. This will give her peace and also you. When you meditate on this, you can connect with the traumas more deeply and heal them. 

TALK WITH OTHERS

This can be with a friend, a family member or a therapist. Talking about the experiences you have had or just about your life can give you a feeling of peace. Knowing that you are not the only one who is carrying this will make the backpack you are carrying less heavy. 

Talking with others about your life will create a deeper bond between you and the other. Take the relationship to the next level and open up about yourself. It’s okay to feel sad or hopeless sometimes, don’t hide it because you are “perfect”. No one is perfect, even the influencers on Instagram aren’t perfect!

CREATE SOMETHING (ART)

Creating art is a beautiful way to express yourself. Don’t judge yourself for how you want to express yourself today. Dark or light, just do it! Wear the clothes you feel like wearing and paint whatever you want to paint.

THE SHADOW

I think connecting with PLUTO will help you to do shadow work. PLUTO is all about the hidden things in life, the hidden force. It’s about what you keep attracting into your life, without being conscious of it, most of the time.

On this site I have more information about the Planets. I think finding out your dominant planet will help you become more authentic and will make it easier to follow your soul purpose. To find out your dominant planet you can take this quiz.

Let today or tonight be an enlightening time and may you connect with your energy. Take a deep breath and get in touch with your energy. Just be in this moment!

You can leave your name and email below, if you want to stay in contact with me. And if not, I hope you will have an amazing life full of love and joy!

May our souls meet again!

-xx- Nella